I just know he's the wonder what his name is.

There's a difference between "settling down" and "settling."
Settling down is meeting that one person you cannot live without and starting a life together and living so happily ever after.
Settling is meeting some person that you weren't really looking for and thinking "Hey, might as well..."
Settling down is confidently putting down roots in something you have full faith in.
Settling is surrendering your faith in yourself for something that is foolish.

This is something I feel strongly about. You can't just give up when it comes to looking for someone to spend the rest of your life with (or longer, depending on your beliefs). If you're submissive about who you date/marry, I can almost guarantee you're going to be miserable, whether you are single or in a relationship. Also, if someone comes along, whom you barely know, and you seemingly hit it off, and decide to get married in a matter of days, that's called desperation. Which is not good. Deciding your life's path in a state of despair, when you NEED to find love, is not the best way to go. But that could just be me.
It could be that I feel this way because I've met so many Mormon missionaries, right off of their mission who are nearly ravenous to find a spouse, because they've been stuck with a companion for two years straight and now they don't know how to be alone. Yeh, that's healthy.... Not. Some of these guys will ask every person they go on a date with, convinced that she has to be The One since she was interested in going on said date in the first place. Or they do the creep on all girls, hoping that The One will be sifted out of all the others. Or they do nothing, complaining about how there are no pretty girls around to date, but when one shows interest, they clam up and don't know what to do. Yeh, guys, good luck with that.
I hope I never make the mistake of settling. If you know anything about me, you know how much I hate making a decision, thus I never settle for second best (or third or fourth, etc.).

Your relationships come and go, but what makes a difference is how you take advantage of the flirting eyes

So, today's prompt (pulled from the SuperCoolBlogBasket) is "Happy & Single." You have no idea how appropriate this subject is for how I'm feeling today.
To begin, let me quote from a couple of posts back.
So, in case you're unaware of my "relationship status" (I'm still trying to come up with something that sounds remotely official), let me clarify for you: I'm single and happy. Not happy because I'm single. Not single because it makes me happy. Just single AND happy in two different contexts. They don't go hand in hand (all the time). I could still be happy in a relationship. I could still be single and miserable. But for now I am single and happy.
Thinking about it, I've really already blogged the hell out of this topic, but I can't leave a sleeping dog lie (if you really knew me, you'd know how true that is). I need to go more into it. So here it is.
I do not need to be in a relationship to be happy. I know I feel that way when I'm just in a mopey mood (and especially if I just broke up with someone), but that's just me being dumb. Because, really, I've been single for the better part of seven months, and these have been some pretty great months.
In relation, I don't have to be single to be happy either. Let's face it: being in a relationship can be pretty blissful. I like being in love.
And I don't know why people are always so upset that they're single. Look at it this way: You're on an adventure! You get to go out and search (passively or assertively [your choice]) for someone who can make your heart melt! Weeeeee! Also, you should be happy you're not with So-and-so who broke your dear little heart, because, obviously, things weren't working out. Who wants to be unhappy in a relationship? See how no one's raising their hands...
As I've said before, your "relationship status" should not affect all your emotions. Be sad after a breakup. That's fine. But being forlorn and hopeless about your life months after is no way to be. I don't want a friend like that, so I don't want to be a friend like that. And most people don't want to walk up and chat with a sad person, no matter how attractive they are, so that means you're not gonna get asked out (more like consoled [not the same thing and also not a good plan to get someone to talk to you]).
Moral of my story post: If you really, really try, I bet you can be happy (unless you've got an icebox where your heart used to be [then you should probably worry and not sing about it]).

We'll see who's laughing when my geek is their boss

I'm a dork. I know it. You know it. Just embrace it, ok?
If you didn't guess, Blog Prompt Numero Tres is "being dorky." Why? Stop being impatient and read.
If I meet a guy and he isn't dorky, it's not gonna happen. And you may say "Well, everyone is a bit geeky from time to time..." and my response to that is "Exactly!"
When meeting someone, within the first half hour of knowing someone, I need to know that they have a dweeby side. Within two minutes is no good: that's way too "different." More than two hours, also no good: you're tring to make a suave first impression.
And why is dorkiness an important part of a relationship? Because.
Everyone is silly and open nerdiness is a sign of being comfortable in one's own skin. That's why.
The Dorky Things I Adore
Vintage Ts.
Frank Sinatra.
Purposely bad dancers.
A guy who can pull off Chucks in a tux.
Old school cartoons.
Reading.
Super heroes.

That's just a small list. I could probably go on, but I tend to make too many lists.

And that's all I can think of for now. I thought this post would be longer, but my concentration is almost nonexistent right now.

You could put the ring up on my middle finger

Prompt #2: My Ultimate Breakup Mixtape.
I believe music is one of the top remedies for a bad (or not so bad) breakup, because it's good to know that someone else knows how you feel. My mixtape (yes, actually, I do have one [yes, I know, I am cool]) highlights the three main stages of recovery for a broken heart. I don't feel like expounding anymore on this, mostly because I'll expound on some or all of the songs. I haven't decided yet.

Stage One: Sadness- Everyone's been in at least one relationship where they bawled their eyes out for days, maybe even weeks. I see that as totally healthy. Because even if it ended well, it's still an end to something important in your life, and sometimes the only way to accept it is to be sad.
1. Everybody Hurts by R.E.M.   This is an awfully depressing one to start out with but it gets the point across that you're not alone, that everyone has had some emotional breakups and that you'll get through it.
2. Another Lonely Day by Ben Harper.   I like this one because it says "it wouldn't have worked out any way," which is something we always tell ourselves, even if we don't believe it.
3. Breakable by Ingrid Michaelson.   This one doesn't sound very sad, but if you know the lyrics you know why it's on my playlist. Once again, it tells how everyone can break, no matter what they do to prevent it.
4. Torn by Natalie Imbruglia.   I like this one because it's one of those "Sing as loud and emotionally as you can while driving in your car by yourself" songs. And sometimes that's just what I need to do when a guy broke my heart.
5. Nothing Better by The Postal Service.   This song is on the edge of sadness and the next stage. It's kind of an angry sadness.
6. Goodbye to You by Michelle Branch.   Again, a song you can sing along to. This song has gotten me through a lot. End of story.

Stage Two: Rage- This is the time to take out your anger on whoever broke your heart and wasted your time. Because really, what made either one of you think that they deserved someone as good as you??
7. This Bitter Pill by Dashboard Confessional.   This song can in no way be mistaken for a love song to the person it's sung to. If someone were to sing it to me, I'd know that I wasn't well liked.
8. Hate (I Really Don't Like You) by the Plain White Ts.   I was going to put one of the lyrics right here but I couldn't decide which one. Because each of them could be the best thing to say to your ex (but probably shouldn't).
9. Revenge is Sweeter (Than You Ever Were) by The Veronicas.   This one's great because everyone wants to give their bf/gf the benefit of the doubt. And then you find out the truth (about anything: cheating, money, habits, the past) and you're like "What the heck? That was obviously more important to you. Thanks for telling me."
10. Kerosene by Miranda Lambert.   Because you can put everything you have into a relationship, but sometimes the results are negative. Also, "you can't hate someone who's dead" is great, because most of my exes are dead to me (or close).
11. Fighter by Christina Aguilera. A grateful hate song. Every ex you have is just another lesson that you can learn from.

Stage Three: Self Empowerment- In order to find someone new, you have to find the ability to live for yourself again. And to do that, you have to be able to pick yourself up and think you're the shiz.
12. I Will Survive by Cake.   This one may be hard to find, but it's great. If you can't find it, go for the classic by Gloria Gaynor. Works the same. Either way, it's a good mood lifter.
13. With a Little Help from My Friends by Joe Anderson or the Beatles.   Don't forget about your friends. They should always be there to help out, and if they're not, they're probably not friends. Friends are my number one breakup remedy. (note: single ones tend to be better)
14. Survivor by Destiny's Child.   A "I don't need you because I'm amazing" song. Enough said, ya hear?
15. Stronger by Britney Spears.   I think the title says it all. Also included, because I used to love this music video, way back in the day.
16. Goodbye to You by The Veronicas.   Unlike the "Goodbye to You" in the Sadness list, this one is extremely happy. Which, of course, is needed.
17. Single Ladies remix by Nicki Minaj.   So the original will do just fine if you can't find this one, but I suggest you search high and low for this one. Why? Because it's got most of the original in it, plus the absurdity that is Nicki. Obviously.
18. Here Comes the Sun by The Beatles.   The finale that kind of wraps it all up. It needs no explanation.


I hope you found that helpful. But you probably didn't.

These shoes rule. These shoes suck!

My first blog using my NewSuperCoolBlogBasket is about.... drumroll, please: Shoes. And I know, you're probably thinking, what the hello do shoes have to do with dating? Well, read on and you'll find out, my little impatient ones.
This is one of the weirdest blog prompts I came up with, but a good one nonetheless, because I developed a theory, as you will come to find out.
A man's shoes say a lot about him. They can usually tell you the kind of guy you're dealing with, based on his "everyday" footwear (what he would wear on a leisurely trip to the grocery store, or say, the post office). The following lists the shoe type and what you might find out about the fellow.
Dirty work boots- This man is obviously a hard worker. He works hard all day & can probably doesn't take the time to relax until well after dinnertime. You can usually count on him to bring home a good amount of bacon.
Pristine work boots- This is one I'd run from. If he's sporting Timberlands that are debris free, I can guarantee he doesn't know what a tough job is but he swears up and down that he sweats all day. Probably because he stands in front of the fry dump all day.
Sneakers- Although I should have a good opinion about a guy wearing his Nikes out, I don't. Sneakers should only be worn in the gym/during physical fitness, around the house for some reason, or if your job requires it. Maybe I just think this because I have some unexplainable vendetta against sneakers. But if you do see a guy wearing them, I can't really help you but to advise you to take cues from his other clothing and the amount of visible sweat.
Cowboy boots- One of my favorites because there are two extremes concerning cowboy boots. To make sure that he's an authentic cowboy (or close enough to not worry), ask yourself two questions: 1.) Are they dirty or rather scuffed? 2.) Are they an unnatural color of leather (anything not brown or blackish)? If you answered yes to the first and no to the second, proceed with slight caution. I only say that because you must once again read the clues given by the rest of his attire and accessories. Examples: Are his jeans naturally worn looking? Good sign. Does he have a belt buckle the size of a dinner plate that reads "Bodacious?" Bad sign. Are there spurs on his boots that jingle every time he walks and reflect all light that hits them? Bad sign.
Converse- This guy is a dork. Don't even argue with some excuse like "He's got the body of a Greek god! He models for Abercrombie!" I promise you: he's a dork. Which, in my opinion, is a good thing. He's probably fun to be around and likes to be comfortable. Like all shoes, check the wear-n-tear. If the white is actually WHITE, this guy is most likely trying too hard. That is, unless they're new shoes. You might want to ask to see if that's the case. Also, take note of the color. If they're classic black and white, he's down to earth. If they're any other color, he might like the classics, just his way.
Skate shoes- You know the ones I'm talking about. Etnies, DC, and the like. As much as I love a skaterboy, that's not someone I would want to settle down with. A guy who always wears skate shoes probably hasn't reached a good level of maturity. Check back in three years. If he's still wearin' 'em, just give up.
Sandals- Truthfully, I can dig when a guy wears sandals. But every day might be over kill. Unless you live on a beach. Which my town is not, so there's no excuse. When it is okay to wear sandals: Barbecues, before and after swimming, around the house, etc. To paraphrase something Demetri Martin says, you don't want to get chased in flipflops. So, if a guy does wear them constantly, he may be impractical. Also, most guys' feet are not pretty, so take note of this. Also, does he seem to be a hippie? This is one exception that you can take or leave.
I have a few more, but this post has gotten kind of long and I'm running out of original, non-repetitive things to say, so I'll close now.
Yes.

'Cause you like me too much and I like you

So, the other day, I was feeling creative. I try to be more creative, more often, but that doesn't happen.

So, what did I do with my creativity? Well, hold on and I'll tell you. Wait for it... Wait for it... I made a Blog Prompt Jar Box Basket. To sum it up, it's a bunch of ideas for me to blog about.

It took forever. Okay, a couple hours. It would have been easier if I didn't stick to one theme. What is that theme, you ask. Love, romance, dating, relationships. All that junk. And you're probably thinking "What the hell does she know about any of that? And if she does know anything, it's obviously the wrong stuff, because she's single. Who wants to hear about relationships and dating advice from someone who can't keep a boyfriend?" Well, that's kinda mean, dontcha think? I don't really consider it to be advice. I consider what I say to be opinions and what I've learned about the L word in the almost 22 years I've been alive. And if you don't want to read about what I have to say, you must be confused because you're reading a blog...

In other news, it's my best friend's day of birth. She's 20 now. Wow. That makes me feel old, even though she's only two years younger than me. I can't believe we're grown-ups now. How does this happen??



And because she's my best friend, she'll probably read this, so I thought I'd post the most flattering picture of us. And just so you know, BEEF, I love you. You're the best friend I could ever ask for. That's the corniest I'm going to be.

I can feel his approach like the fire in my blood

Recently, I was asked what I'm "looking for in a man." I didn't really know what to say besides the generic stuff like "good sense of humor" and "reliable" and "hasn't done drugs in the last six years." Why? Because I never really took the time to think on it that much. I mean, don't get me wrong: I had ideas and guidelines,  but never had the specifics for my Perfect Man. So, if the person who asked reads this, here ya go. To all others who read this, keep an eye out for this guy and let me know where he is. Like all my lists, these are in no particular order.

• Someone who REALLY loves soup, because that's my specialty.
• Someone who can cook for himself if necessary, and who wouldn't mind cooking for me as well from time to time.
• Someone who I can look up to, literally and figuratively.
• Someone who loves and respects his mother but doesn't have to run to her for every tiny thing.
• Someone who can understand that sometimes I can be a little irrational but can totally tolerate it.
• Someone who can bear my humor with all of its corny and sarcastic glory.
• Someone who finds my quirks endearing and has a few of his own.
• Someone who knows what they want in life even though I'm still working on that myself.
• Someone who's not embarrassed when I (poorly) break out into song and might even join in. Unless he knows it's a powerful solo meant for only one voice.
• Someone who's not afraid of flaws.
• Someone who loves my friends a little less than I do and has friends that I can love as well.
• Someone who can appreciate my eccentric taste in fashion and decorating styles.
• Someone who sleeps on the left side of the bed or is willing to because I will not.
• Someone who doesn't like blankets or likes having their own because I need to be wrapped up in my own.
• Someone who doesn't care that I can't take a serious photo to save my life.
• Someone who's a lefty, although this isn't an absolute necessity.
• Someone who doesn't mind me correcting their grammar or who already has adequate grammar and rarely (or never) needs corrected.
• Someone who I can make fun of and who can make fun of me (to an extent).
• Someone who knows that when I say I hate surprises, I'm lying a little.
• Someone who needs a menagerie of animals (and maybe a child or two) in their life.
• Someone who doesn't care that I love all (or most) things Disney.
• Someone who wouldn't mind living in an Airstream trailer for a few years while we travel around the U.S.
• Someone who assists me in finding happiness, no matter where or what it might be.
• Someone who embraces my argumentative side.
• Someone who is always ready with a clever (but not hurtful) comeback.
• Someone who will simultaneously groan at and applaud my punniness.
• Someone who will not be offended by me, especially when that's what I want.
• Someone who understands I am a woman and realizes that it's very likely that I'll be in a pretty pissy mood every 28ish days.
• Someone who can accept that I have different levels of beauty from day to day or someone who can easily disguise their disgust.
• Someone who can respect that sweatpants are a staple part of my existence.
• Someone who can eat sushi one day and then something artery clogging the next.
• Someone who knows it's imperative that I have seventy different shampoos in the shower and that he can use the cheapo bulk ones or get his own.
• Someone who doesn't care if I don't shave my legs every day because sometimes I don't care and/or I'm lazy.
• Someone who knows that the Chapstik/lip balm in the check-out lane at Walmart is targeted at me and I must buy one.
• Someone who is always in search of new music. Or old music he's never heard.
• Someone who can accept my love of almost all beverages and sometimes humor it.
• Someone who loves the outdoors and can force me outside.
• Someone who doesn't snore. Plain and simple.
• Someone who can go out with the guys when he needs to and not worry about me surviving without him for a short amount of time (hint: I will).
• Someone who knows I need time for me every so often.
• Someone who will text me something stupid, even if I'm sitting right next to him.
• Someone who doesn't mind that I tend to think waaay too much.
• Someone who accepts my unconventional sleeping habits and schedules.
• Most of all, someone who can be my best friend.